Three Moments
Thursday 15th August 2013
2:15pm
Sitting in my car looking over the fields and across to the hills thinking “This is such a lovely place, I wonder what will be in the flower beds for me to photograph today”.
This used to be a fortnightly ritual, when I worked here that is.
It is six months since I was here.
I have been invited to the ‘café’ today because they miss me, of course, but more importantly one of ‘our’ volunteers is leaving today, she is moving out of the area and she asked if I could call in to say goodbye.
I am feeling nervous and apprehensive.
4:30pm
I had a really lovely afternoon; they made me feel so welcome. There were lots of hugs, how are you’s, kisses and compliments.
I had cake and coffee, talked and laughed, sympathised and suggested a couple of things to someone who asked for my advice.
I have flowers to take home and I have lots of pictures of the Rudbeckia looking so bright and cheerful in the flower beds.
5:15pm
Paul asked “how did it go? Are you OK? Were they pleased to see you?”
Ben asked me “How was it? Did you have cake? Did you bring any home?”
“It was lovely: afternoon and cake. I had a good time, I loved seeing them but I don’t want to do it anymore and no I didn’t bring any cake home”
I gave so much, I love them but I can’t carry their lives in my head and heart any more.
He said, “you don’t have to, you retired, stay home, do blogging, you love that.”
And so I do.
Thank you Alexa. I know I am on a blogging break but I really wanted to do this today, to remember a moment (or three) that was important to me. Your meme prompts me to do just that.
a great moment of clarity on what you don’t need and don’t have to do anymore
Very beautifully recorded, just as you experienced it, Miriam. It seems as if going back helped you to see the way forward … Carrying lives in heart and head is weighty indeed. But the rudbeckia are glorious! I have only ever seen very yellow ones. Hoping you enjoy a lovely break and thank-you so much for pausing so that you could contribute today :).
He’s right, holding the past to the exclusion of the future is never a happy thing. Journal those memories then wrap them in tissue paper and put them in a safe place to be taken out on dull winter days when spring seems impossible. Your moments definitely seem like the turning point.
Thank you for sharing
This one resonated with me today because, with TTO about to leave us for university, we have been talking about the gaps which are left and how sometimes they close over or are filled and sometimes they aren’t. And I was remembering going back to visit the library and bringing my new baby boy to show them. A lovely moment!
This really moved me Miriam. A moment well worth documenting. And how wonderful to know your mind [and heart] well enough, and have the clarity to know what’s best. People still ask my Dad how on earth he’s coping after retiring [thinking he must miss it] and he simply says ‘I got up every morning for 50 years, and now I don’t *have* to, I don’t.’ Simple as that. x
I like your way of telling your story… so personal and intimate feelings…
cris
lalchimisteartisane.blogspot.com
A perfect moment, Miriam…now you know that you really DID make the right decision!
Alison xx
Beautifully captured moments – – and beautifully written. Thank you. J x
How wonderful to go back one more time to do your part, and then bravely walk away knowing it’s all behind you. I smiled when I read “do blogging, you love that.” I can totally relate!
Your flower photos are just lovely, Miriam. I hope you’re enjoying your break! xo
Oh, thanks for sharing that. I know how it feels to go back and visit where you used to work. And even when you are leaving friends behind, sometimes you just need to move on. I hope you enjoy the rest of your blogging break.
Oh as another struggling with moving forward this really resonated with me. I’m glad it was a good experience and helped you realise you have moved on! Lovely flowers.
Beautiful moment, Miriam. Nice that you know now that you don’t need to go back. I also loved Ben’s comment – how was it and did you bring home cake! Now that’s my kind of person!
Wonderfully recorded and so nice that you can stay home and do blogging 😀
Wow – you really captured a moment of enlightenment and unburdening!
Thanks for sharing,
Rinda
p.s. Sorry its’ taken me a while to get round and comment; I’ve been a bit under the weather.