For Dementia Awareness Week
This week (from 17th – 23 May) in the UK it is Dementia Awareness Week.
Some of you will know that I worked for Alzheimer’s society until I retired a couple of years ago.
I would like to acknowledge the work of the society and to contribute to Dementia Awareness Week by posting ‘something different for me’: a short sketch each day called
“All in a days work”
These are not remembered stories but real events I wrote up a long time ago right after the visit/phone call.
As support workers we had excellent support in the office but on the rare occasion I couldn’t get there after I finished a visit or I was alone in the office I used to write down my thoughts and feelings and let the paper listen.
Return Visit
“They say want to support me but they don’t. They are always busy” he said
I remembered and said “They were here when I visited before?”
“ I haven’t seen them since” he said unhappily
“I rang and asked if she could have her mum for the afternoon next week to let me go to my club’s dinner but no, she was busy herself” he said.
He looked across at his wife who asked me again if I would like a coffee. “Sometimes she thinks I’m her brother but at the moment she still seems to recognise my voice so it doesn’t last long”.
“This is our second marriage you know” he told me.
I said that yes I knew. I wanted to talk a little bit about how knowledge about the disease would help so much: it could enable him to have a little patience with her (and peace for himself) if her knew what was happening to her.
“When her grandson was terribly ill she shut me out,
her own children and her grandson were all she cared about.
He died, he was only eight she shut me out she had a stroke and now I am expected to care for her, it’s hard” he said as the tears came.
“The day she doesn’t recognise me I will need your help to find a care home” he sobbed.
“Of course I’ll help and until that day I’ll help you to try to understand the disease and help you to care in the best way you can”.
I left with a heavy heart that morning
Thank you all for your support this week.
heart wrenching – your quote is so true
Beautifully written series of posts, Miriam.
You must have given so much to the people you worked with, Miriam. As a carer myself, I can see how much it must have meant to them to feel heard and understood even if there was little that could be done. Saluting you from here :).
Miriam, this is gorgeous!!!